Lady GaGa

Ten more subjects whose 15 minutes of fame should be over any time now …

1. Lady GaGa: I thought she was entertaining for about 60 seconds when she performed on “American Idol” earlier this year. Now she’s just kind of annoying, especially the zipper over the eye schtick.

2. “Land of the Lost” movie: Get it out of the theaters now. It’s an insult to our collective intelligence. Anyone out there running a video rental store might want to pass on this particular title.

3. The “Halloween” movie franchise: I would rather sit through “Land of the Lost” again than watch another entry into the Michael Myers debacle. I find it unbelievable there’s another one of these films hitting the theaters later this year.

4.The Rihanna and Chris Brown soap opera: Here’s the bottom line. If she is stupid enough to go back to the guy who beat her up, then how much sympathy are we supposed to have? Obviously, Rihanna, the guy is a thug. It’s time to move on. And we don’t want to hear anymore about this subject.

5. Bryce Harper: Sports Illustrated dubbed this 16-year-old las Vegas high school baseball player “The Chosen One,” the best of all time or something along that line. Now we hear he is leaving high school two years early, thanks to a GED, and will enroll in a community college to be eligible for the 2010 Major League Draft. Does anyone remember David Clyde? This story will not have a happy ending. Guaranteed.

6. Michael Jackson: Every so often Jacko pops his weird head out from under a rock and grabs a few headlines. I read where he is upset because he will have to do 50 shows instead of just 10 on some European tour, due to some sort of contract snafu. Notice the tour is across the pond. That’s because the promoter is smart enough to realize Jacko is not exactly boffo box office in the land of the free.

Dale Earnhardt Jr.

7. Dale Earnhardt Jr.: I know my NASCAR brethren will hate me for this, and realize I will be public enemy No. 1 in Junior Nation, but it might be time to come to grips with the fact he’s just not that good. How could anyone move to Hendrick Motorsports and be this bad?

8. Kara DioGuardi: Has anyone even heard her name mentioned since the end of “American Idol?” Maybe she went underground after writing that ridiculous “No Boundaries” song Kris Allen is singing these days on the radio.

9. Susan Boyle: Susan who? I thought so.

10. North Korea: These guys, especially the vertically challenged “Dear Leader” of this armpit of a country, are annoying me more than even that “Land of the Lost” movie. Maybe that’s how we can solve this international dilemma. Threaten them with having to watch “Land of the Lost” for a week solid they don’t start playing nicer with the rest of the world.

Kirstie Alley is big again. So what's new?

Ten people, groups or things whose 15 minutes of fame are up:

Somalian pirates: As NBA analyst Charles Barkley said to Anderson Cooper of CNN, “Why don’t we just shoot those damn pirates?” Possibly for the first time in his life, Sir Charles made sense. Seriously, why do we give these second-rate hoodlums all of this time and attention? Send in a couple of cruise missiles, sink their ships and the problem can be eradicated. Geesh. If only I ruled the world.

Kirstie Alley: She’s binge eating again. She’s the size of Busch Stadium. I don’t care.

Nadya Suleman: The octumom’s time has come … and gone. I feel sorry for each and everyone of her 14 kids, because Icannot imagine what kind of life awaits them, especially the newest eight. And Nadya, the next time you need a babysitter, I’m busy.

Jessica Simpson: She’s lost as much weight Kirstie Alley has gained after the nasty media made fun of her packing on a few pounds. If boyfriend Tony Romo doesn’t care, I certainly don’t.

Madonna: When was the last time she had any sort of hit record? Why do we care if she is helping ruin the career and reputation of Alex Rodriguez? She’s not important. Not at all.

A-Rod and Madonna? Enough already.

Alex Rodriguez: He was supposed to the Golden Boy who would break Barry Bonds’ soiled home run record and all would be right with baseball. No such luck. It turns out A-Rod is as big of a hoax — and liar — as Bonds. Alex, I no longer care what you do, with or without Madonna.

The swine flu: OK, seriously, in another month we’re going to be saying, “What was that all about?” Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano said Monday, “What the epidemiologists are seeing now with this particular strain of U.N. is that the severity of the disease, the severity of the flu — how sick you get — is not stronger than regular seasonal flu.”

Prison Break: The one-time Fox TV phenomenon has been canceled. The show actually died about two years ago but had been kept on life support.

My Name is Earl: It appears NBC is ready to pull the plug (please!) on this annoying show, but industry rumors hint Fox may pick it up (please don’t). You have no idea how much I cannot stand this show.

“X-Men Origins: Wolverine” commercials: Enough! As much as I enjoy Hugh Jackman, I will go crazy if I have to watch him emerge from the water with those claws one more time.